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the most adjective thing in the world

March 5, 2019 at 9:20 pm. Posted in Writing with the Tags: , | No comments

My wife is training to be a teacher this year. And tomorrow, on her placement, she is teaching a lesson on variables for a 3rd year class. Oh, it’s Computing Science she’s teaching.

She has asked me to throw together a story which she, and the class, can use for plugging data into.

The variables, if you’re interested, are name, place, adjective, object, number, comment.

And here it is, just for fun.

Travelling /Name/, the salesman, approached the door. The box almost slipped out of his grasp as he used his elbow to push the doorbell. /Name/ held his breath. Was anyone home? It was the first house he had tried since leaving /Place/.

A light flickered on through the frosted glass.

He could hear muttering, two voices arguing. He tried his best salesman smile.

The door opened.

“Have I got a bargain for you,” /Name/ said.

“Please, go away,” said the man whose house it was. “I don’t want any trouble.”

“I don’t bring trouble, friend,” said /Name/. “I bring opportunity!” He patted the box. “This.”

“I don’t…” began the man.

“This,” repeated /Name/, louder this time, “is the most /Adjective/ thing in the world. And it can be all yours.”

“I’m really not…” stammered the man.

“Interested?” finished the salesman. “You haven’t even seen it yet…” And before the man could say another word he opened the lid of the box. A golden glow shone from within.

“It’s so /Adjective/,” said the man. “/Adjective/ /Object/. I’ve never seen so many.”

“I’ve /Number/ of them.”

“How did you fit them all in?”

“Well, /Comment/,” he said with a wink.

update : writing

April 12, 2018 at 3:39 pm. Posted in Writing with the Tags: , , | No comments

Let’s be honest here. My interest in writing anything at all died on its arse. Sure I’d have moments where I missed the thrill of putting pen to paper but generally? Nah. Forget it.

So, has anything changed in that regard?

Maybe. Kind of.

There was a recent submissions window for the Black Library, which is Games Workshop’s fiction publishing arm. They were looking for a 500 words of the start, or thereabouts, of a short story based on one of their main properties. In previous years when they’ve done this I’ve shown an interest but never had anything ready in time. This year I thought it might be interesting to try but as I mentioned above, my heart really hasn’t been in the whole word bashing thing. So I left it.

And I don’t know what changed. On Sunday I thought, why not, and I bashed out five hundred words that afternoon. I polished it up and, with a summary of where I thought the story would go, I submitted it Monday evening. Now, I can’t actually believe I did that as THAT’S NOT SOMETHING I DO.

But it was on Monday.

So this isn’t me saying that I’m back on the wagon. Far from it. But if another submission window comes along that raises an eyebrow or a weird idea pops into my head that just won’t leave me alone, then I might bash some words out for it. I’ll see.

As for the Black Library submission? It took me by surprise. The whole actually submitting part of it. I’m not exactly expecting anything from them, but you never know.